Christians are straight up FREAKS
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
