I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
