Buhtt sex?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
