My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
