Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
