So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
