It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
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Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
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Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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