Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
