yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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