You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
