Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize