puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
