its not stalking. its research.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄