Kiss
Puke
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
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