My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa