Texts From Last Night

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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  You're upset about this?

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  (803): We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF? (843): You're upset about this? http://tfl.nu/f42n
  Replies (28) Good night (2703) Bad night (1344)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.

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  (713): I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here. http://tfl.nu/xixg
  Replies (20) Good night (5122) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.

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  (503): Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie. http://tfl.nu/g56z
  Replies (13) Good night (3654) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it

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  (201): so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it http://tfl.nu/kytb
  Replies (18) Good night (1314) Bad night (4767)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook

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  (918): People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook http://tfl.nu/2iw1
  Replies (11) Good night (4051) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.

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  (317): I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare. http://tfl.nu/t1bj
  Replies (12) Good night (4143) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.

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  (402): my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen. http://tfl.nu/06g9
  Replies (2) Good night (4067) Bad night (1219)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.

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  (810): people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart. http://tfl.nu/4ahf
  Replies (14) Good night (3550) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.

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  (317): Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good. http://tfl.nu/7ot5
  Replies (2) Good night (3257) Bad night (816)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour

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  (416): Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour http://tfl.nu/t42p
  Replies (4) Good night (1968) Bad night (703)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.

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  (410): Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo (410): Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman. http://tfl.nu/b3bx
  Replies (2) Good night (1436) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station

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  (623): It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station http://tfl.nu/4d6r
  Replies (6) Good night (708) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Especially drunk mermaids.

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  (208): That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck. (208): Especially drunk mermaids. http://tfl.nu/soai
  Replies (8) Good night (1197) Bad night (361)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?

  (1-301): View more from Maryland

  It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.

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  (301): Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one? (1-301): It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem. http://tfl.nu/x27d
  Replies (7) Good night (878) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.

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  (605): I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help. http://tfl.nu/advt
  Replies (0) Good night (312) Bad night (251)

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