I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I have fence marks all over my body
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
