I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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