My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
