Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Your dad touched me again.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
