Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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