NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize