what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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