I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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