We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize