why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
