she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
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