his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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