ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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