last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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