it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Randomize