we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
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I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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