BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
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