omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
