Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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