I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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