Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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