i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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