Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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