Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
