And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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