Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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