I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
