so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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