Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
