U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
