C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
