im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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