I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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