you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
