I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
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I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
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You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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