I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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