Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
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I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
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Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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