he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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