these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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